Thursday, September 08, 2005

The problem

OK, now I am ready to tell you the real problem with this situation:

I know that this story has been told before – wasn’t in the last couple years that there was even a TV show based on the concept of getting to re-live your high school days? Well, those stories were based on the idea that you had regrets to fix and that you were unhappy in your current life.

Well, I was happy. Look at my life. My wife was one of the most intelligent, funny, and beautiful women that I had ever met. I was blissfully happy with her. My kids were equally wonderful. And my job was to travel the world, taking photographs of the people, the land, or whatever stuck my fancy. I was able to take my family with me on many occasions. With my wife being a teacher, we were able to “home school” our children while we traveled. She would teach while I did the business side of the work – writing the commentary on the photos, uploading them to the central database, providing approvals on the final croppings and editing done by the digital side of the work.
See what I mean? I had very few problems in my life. Sure, I did have some dark spots in my past, and things that I would like to avoid repeating. But therein lies the problem – my mistakes led me down a path that eventually worked out quite well for me.
Could I use my knowledge the future to make myself wealthy and successful? Absolutely. Will that lead me back to meeting my wife again? I don’t know. Even if I do meet her – for certainly I know where she is right now – how can I possibly replicate our previous dating relationship? If I tell her about my memories, that will certainly change her reactions. And if I don’t… when do I tell her? Never? I could not live with that dishonesty.
And that is the crux of my dilemma – everything else pales in comparison. How do I live my life now in a way that gets me back to my wife? I’m not prepared to let that go. I’m totally willing to entertain suggestions from anyone who stumbles upon these pages.

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